Archive for November, 2013

From 1 child to 3 and changes

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Ok so much has happened, getting married, working to going on maternity leave and looking after a 3 year old and now gone from a mum to one child to a mum of 3 as now I am off on maternity leave I have had twins a beautiful son named Jayden James and a daughter Lexi Rose, I expected to find it hard I didn’t find it hard as such to looking after twins as lucky for my my babies have slept good since they were born. It was my son I was truly most concerned about as through my pregnancy the bigger I got the more my son seemed to decide to play up more and more and it seemed he has gone from this angel to a devil overnight. He knew things were changing and I think it scared him that I was terrified how he would react when the babies were finally here.

I shouldn’t have worried my dad and stepmum took him whilst I was in hospital for my c-sec and the days after and when they finally brought him to the hospital it wasn’t me he rushed to see it was his baby brother who was with me I had to take him to his baby sister in special care and he didn’t want to leave her, he adored her and didn’t like thT she was not with her brother or any of us. He is so protective of his brother and sister and is so good with them and he helps me as much as he can even now when they are 5 months old in 2 days. He has truly grown up a lot probably a lot more than he needs to.

Although he helps out a lot he has had a lot of changes to deal with his Dad and I got married in early pregnancy just after his 3rd birthday, we then had the twins I had prepared him for there arrival, I made sure he was aware of my stomach and what was happening but I never pushed the subject and when people talked about the babies I always tried to include him as this upset him if he wasn’t inuded and I always let him broach the subject rather than being too pushy but now and then gently reminding him of them that they were there for example if he was too rough around me.

We then had the twins 6/6/13 and we moved just after he finished nursery, he has never had a day off nursery not even a 6 week holiday and he struggled with all this on top of getting a new house and then starting a new school which he loves thankfully he is confused that he only does a very short day something he is not used to.

In al this chaos he has not shown any hatred or anger towards the twins just love and adoration for them.

However for his Dad and I it’s been a completely different story and he has decided to start answering back, not listen to a word we say and pulling tantrums. We have started a star chart which works a lot of the time but he seems to be getting bored of this, he is not a naughty kid bed is very bright for his age that all this change in him seems quite upsetting for his dad and I because he won’t tell me what’s bothering him or what’s going through his mind and I guess all the changes have gotten to him far more than I expected it to.

To be fair, with people saying things such as ‘Oh, he will be fine, kids are resilient and deal with things far quicker than us’ I expected a week maybe 2 weeks of him acting out but he is still doing it to this day that it has at times had me really upset and drained and he seems to constantly be on the naughty step.

This has become physically and emotionaly draining, yet I know he loves me he is full of it when he is good lots of hugs and kisses and his dad is not allowed anywhere near me as according to him I am his girl and his girl alone. I have seen kids act ten times worse than my son and I am truly hoping this is a phase but even I’m still trying to get used to the fact I’m no longer a mum to 1 child but a mum to 3 I guess I can’t expect him to be used to not getting the attention 24/7 as much anymore.

He is only 3 and I am truly hoping I am not the only mum dealing with this as I can honestly say before this he was never like this and we have come to the conclusion that he never had his terrible two’s not properly and instead he is doing it all at 3.

I had no intention of sharing this originally as I don’t want people seeing my son as a horror a child who never does as his told as he is he is an angel just a child dealing with so many changes and unable to deal with his emotions and talk them through with us.

He is 4 in four weeks will he change over night then too? I can only wonder and let this phase wear itself out, I only hope.

I’m a proud mum not to one but to 3 beautiful children and one doing the very best I can

Thanks for reading